TeTIObCod

I have Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. Sometimes. Sort of.

In fact I have come up with a name for this new condition: Temporary Ticket-Induced Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (TeTIObCoD). It is a condition that strikes whenever you buy a ticket with a seat number on it. For me it strikes every time I go to the cinema. Every. Time. Even when I obsess about not doing it before I purchase the ticket, I do it.

The typical scenario goes like this for me:

  1. Arrive at cinema as a normal person with wife and friends, (friends optional).
  2. Skip the queue and go to the self-service terminal that people over the age of 30 think is powered by voodoo and will therefore eat their souls.
  3. Feel smug about beating the queue.
  4. Check seat number.
  5. When leaving the ticket machine check seat number again.
  6. Start to feel a bit retarded about forgetting your ticket number again and having to check it so soon.
  7. Check seat number again before giving your ticket to the ticket-checker-person because obviously it might change whilst in their possession for the ticket-tearing ritual that they perform.
  8. Check once more when you get your ticket stub back because you can’t trust those squinty-eyed, unshaven, mumbling ticket-checker-people.
  9. Wander to the correct screen feeling like a full-blown retard who is incapable of remembering a seat number.
  10. in the last patch of good light before walking through the doors check seat number again.
  11. Sit in the wrong seat.
  12. Check ticket stub again and move to the correct seat.
  13. Forget about your retardedness as soon as the second movie trailer has finished.
  14. Watch the movie and leave with popcorn pieces on your lap feeling warm and fuzzy/entertained/terrified/thoughtful/like slitting your wrists depending on what movie you’ve just seen.
  15. Repeat next time you watch a movie.

I also do this with plane tickets.

I have found that the best way of curing TeTIObCoD is to give my ticket to my wife. That way I’m less crazy and I get to watch her go through it. Mwahahaha!

 

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About Luke

Daddy of two boys, husband of one exquisite wife. Fun-pursuer, baby-rocker, nappy-changer, lover-of-learning, Jesus-follower, music enthousiast and consumer of good food and drink. I want to make the world better and help people fulfil their potential.
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